Lighten Up with EFT

A Demonstration of Emotional Freedom Techniques

Use the “Opposites” EFT Technique to Lighten Up Your Reaction to a Situation—Quickly and Easily

EFT can do a lot of different things, depending on how it’s used. It can help you reduce or eliminate a reaction to something bothering you, whether minor or major, as I’m about to show you. EFT can also eliminate phobias, repattern major anxiety/stress and trauma reactions into healthy balance, improve your attitude toward yourself and life, often eliminate long-standing chronic pain, or even prevent jet lag (which the rest of this site is about, if you arrived at this page from outside).

What follows is one of many EFT techniques, this one aimed at reducing or eliminating a negative reaction to something bothering you. You can use it as many times as you like, on as many things as you can identify which bother you. It only takes a minute or two to run through it. If you have anything to try it on, prepare to be slightly amazed. Here we go:

Dehydration alert: drink some water If you haven’t had any water lately, please drink some. Dehydration can stop EFT from working.

Three things are necessary for this session.

First, you need something that bothers you. You probably have that.
Second is learning where a few easily reached acupressure points are located. That’s easy with the diagram and descriptions below.
Third is a way to put them together. That’s what this is all about.

Step 1. Think of an incident or situation which currently bothers you. “Bother” includes irritation, annoyance, distress, and mild to moderate anger, but not rage. Specific, contained situations are best for this demonstration. John said this to you on the phone, or Maurice didn’t follow through on that, or Janice didn’t return my call, or you came home to find that Susie left the door unlocked, are examples.

Make it simple. The kind of situation you want for this demonstration is the simplest possible scene that could be in a movie. You see or hear something, and you react. That’s it. Leave out the rest of the story and any other pieces of it. A complex situation or many situations can be dealt with effectively one piece at a time. In other words, chunk it down. Here we want just one focused piece.

Major events: Please don’t try to address a life-shattering event or a condition like PTSD with this demo, or on your own. EFT handles trauma well, but working with an experienced practitioner (including yours truly) is advised.

Identify the situation, then…

Step 2. Find the EFT acupressure points on your own body

EB—Eyebrow: The beginning of either eyebrow, where the bone behind the eyebrow turns into the bridge of the nose (not up on the forehead or between the eyebrows).
SE—Side of Eye: On the bone directly beside either eye (not further back on the side of the head).
UE—Under Eye: Centered under either eye, on the upper edge of the bone. Please move your glasses if necessary to reach this point.

UN—Under Nose: Between the nose and upper lip.
UM—Under Mouth: Between the lower lip and chin.
UC—Under Collarbone: From the center of the hollow of
your throat, go down two inches (5 cm) and to either side
two inches (5 cm), to the hollow just under the collarbone.
UA—Under Arm: On the side, down from either armpit one hand’s width (4 inches or 10 cm). Pat this area.

Step 3. Put it together

Make the statements below with focus.

Make them aloud, under your breath, or mentally.

“This thing” means your situation and “bother” means how it affects you.

Final focus

Bring the situation to mind.
Notice how intense your feeling is as you think of the whole situation right now, not how you felt when it happened.
Take a snapshot of that whole present response so you can remember it later.
Massage the indicated points for a few seconds each as you say what is written by each one.

EB (Eyebrow)—This thing really bothers me.
SE (Side of Eye)—This thing does not bother me.
UE (Under Eye)—It really does bother me.
UN (Under Nose)—It doesn’t bother me. Not at all.
UM (Under Mouth)—Yes it does. It bothers me a lot.
UC (Under Collarbone)—No it doesn’t. I don’t have to be bothered by it and I choose not to be bothered by it.
UA (Under Arm)—Of course it bothers me. Things like this always bother me. (Note: keep going right back up to the EB point)
EB (Eyebrow)—It doesn’t bother me.
SE (Side of Eye)—It does bother me. I’m not going to change on that.
UE (Under Eye)—But what if it really doesn’t bother me? Don’t I get to choose?
UN (Under Nose)—I can have it bother me if I want, and as much as I want.
UM (Under Mouth)—I can have it bother me less or not at all if I want. It’s up to me.
UC (Under Collarbone)—No, I’m committed to being bothered by this thing. It’s part of who I am.
UA (Under Arm)—No it’s not. I don’t need to be bothered by this, and it doesn’t bother me.

Okay. Good job. Stop and let things settle for a few seconds. Take a deep breath and let it out. Now check in on your reaction right now to the same situation you started with. How intense is your reaction now compared the snapshot you took before we started?

Are you as bothered as you were? Most people will feel less bothered. You might even be amused by it now. That’s a good sign you handled it rather completely.

If it bothers you less but still some, you can repeat the sequence. The intensity of your reaction ought to go down each time. If it gets near zero the rest will probably fade within 24 hours.

In EFT we like to go to zero percent botheration on things like this, so go for it. Why keep a souvenir of something you don’t like? Feel free to repeat until there’s no more negative reaction at all from thinking of your situation.

If you seem stuck, focus more carefully (and if you didn’t drink some water, do that now). Maybe you didn’t get it down to the simplest possible scene. A divided focus can confuse the results.

Or the original situation may be handled and you’re actually on to a new one without noticing. This happens. Focus in precisely on the original situation and see if you are reacting the same way as before.

If you’ve moved on, fine. It means the original situation no longer bothers you, which is the point of the demonstration. You can work on a new situation with the same process, or stop.

What’s your result? If this worked for you, in a few seconds you’ve reclaimed attention and energy you were putting into being bothered. And you’ve also opened up possibilities for better outcomes because you won’t be coming from irritation or upset. For a few seconds of work, that’s a pretty good payoff.

If you think positive results must be a fluke or a coincidence I encourage you to do it again on another issue. Test it. Do it ten times on ten different issues. Do it a hundred times, over weeks, and check back on what you worked on to see if the results last. You’ll have to write them down, because they will vanish from your memory. I will bet you 10,000 electrons you get consistent positive results.

Equivalent or greater benefits are around every corner with EFT. If you’re traveling, Jet Lag Passport can do to your jet lag what this did to your being bothered—make it disappear.

If you want to do more and feel you would make faster or deeper progress with insightful help, feel free to contact me. I am certified in using this method and have used it for six years, but I am not a therapist. I teach people to use EFT to dismantle unwanted reactions and to replace then with more satisfying ones. I work in person in the Bellingham, WA area (USA, not West Australia) and anywhere by phone. End of self-advertisement.

You can adapt this “opposites” process to many situations. Here’s the outline of how to use it. Feel free to be creative:

If you like definite procedures,

Start at the EB point with a statement about what you do not want, such as, “I’m upset at John for calling me a twit.” (The condition of being upset is what you do not want, in this case.)
Then alternate that with an opposite statement about what you do want, such as “I’m not upset at John for calling me a twit” at each successive point. (The condition of not being upset is what you do want.)
Go through all the points twice. The result is that each point gets both positive and negative statements, and you end on a positive statement. Repeat as necessary, changing the words to reflect current reality as your attitude changes.
If you miss a point or get off track, either start over or just do another point to end on what you do want. This is a very forgiving procedure.

If you like to be creative, follow the same process, but you can gradually become very free and intuitive with what you say. With your attention on the issue, say whatever comes to mind as you go from point to point.

One good way is to start with opposite statements as described, then take it forward with the idea that two different parts of you are stating their sides, essentially arguing.

Doing this with the point stimulation tends to dissolve the negative, reactive stance, leaving the more open, desirable stance in place. I consider this a demonstration that our natural selves are healthy and balanced.

For more fun, the two sides can exaggerate and overstate their case, their demands, their needs, their reasons, and so on. If it comes to mind, say it. Go ahead and be outrageous. You’re just talking to yourself, after all. You may surprise yourself with the insights that come out of your mouth, and the situation will very likely seem different after you do this. You may find you have a different opinion about or understanding of those involved, including yourself, or see new ways forward.

Enjoy. Let me know your results, if you want, with the link below, and I may post them here if you give permission (anonymously, of course).

Daimon

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